Thankful for...

I suppose now would be a fitting time to step back into the blogosphere and begin to post again. How fitting it would be given that Thanksgiving is today that I re-enter this realm with a post about all the things I'm thanksful for...

I am first and foremost thankful for my children. Luciano is my beacon of light and Marcelo always reminds me of what living life to the fullest should mean. I am thankful for being able to watch them sleep and to hear them breathe. I am deeply thankful for hearing them laugh, for the laugh of a child radiates and heals. I am thankful they are both healthy, despite Marcelo's heart defects he is a healthy normal little toddler and Luciano has a constitution like no other. I am thankful that Luciano recognizes compassion and has a deep sense of self worth and I am thankful that Marcelo is stubborn and a fighter, because these qualities will fair well for his battles in life with CHD. I am thankful for the comedy they provide for me and the kisses they shower me with. For them I am thankful.

I am thankful for my husband Edgard, for without him none of the above paragraph would be possible. I am thankful that he works hard to take care of our family and does so without question. I am thankful that he plays Mr. Mom, especially as of late when I have been working. I am thankful after all these years and all my craziness he still loves me like it was day on of our marriage. I am thankful he sees me as his queen and I am thankful he treats me as an equal. I am thankful he is the warrior who protects his family without question and I am thankful for his undying dedication to me. For him I am thankful.

I am thankful for my mother, she always steps up to the plate and takes care of her baby (me). I am thankful she's willing to watch my children even though I know it is tough on her because Mr. Marcelo can be quite a handful. I am thankful she is the Matriarch of our family, to take care of us, to be there for us and to do so lovingly and so well. I am thankful she is still as vibrant and capable as she has always been, I am thankful she's still stronger than me and that she is amazing. For her I am thankful.

I am thankful for my father. I am thankful for the amazing gift of wisdom he implores on Luciano as they walk home from school many days a week. I am thankful he's able to be with Marcelo while he's little and I am thankful for his help when I make him fix my stuff. For him I am thankful.

For my siblings I am thankful:

I am thankful for Keith, who despite our occasional differences in the past, over the last year I have been able to get to know him on a level to which prior I did not know. I am thankful for his advice and all the nights we spend chatting while he's in his hotel rooms, for him I am thankful.

For Traci I am thankful. Although we live so far away and don't EVER get to see each other I'm glad we have Facebook to know each other and share that sisterly bond, for her I am thankful.

I'm thankful for Todd, because although we might not speak much he's taught me a great lesson in compassion and in forgiveness and for that lesson I am thankful.

For Angela Maria I am thankful. She may not be my sister by blood but she is my sister in every sense of the word. She is the Godmother for both of my children and she loves them as her own, she has been there for me for most of my life and has showered me with love and friendship of which prior I could not comprehend. She is an amazing woman and a complete mentor for me who has been an integral part in teaching me life's lessons and becoming who I am today. For her I am thankful.

I am thankful for Congenital Heart Defects, and although I wish with every inch of my being I never had to know them and that no child should ever have to struggle and deal with such abhorrent existences I am thankful that it has taught me just how precious life is and has brought some wonderful people into my life who are a unique arm of my family because we share such an amazing bond through CHD. Friends who have changed me and helped me grow with my son's defects and helped to make me a stronger mother through adversity:

I am thankful for Heloisa who is an amazing woman, who always knows the right thing to say when I am on the dark side of the moon, who's son will hopefully grow up with mine as a brother in the CHD world and they will fight the fight and win because they are warriors. I am thankful to her for showing me that with diversity and diplomacy is the only way to live. I am thankful for all the late nights we spend chatting and especially laughing because sometimes laughter is the best medicine, for her I am thankful.

I am thankful for Valerie, although we live quite a ways away I was honored to meet her in person in her home last summer because she and I share a wonderful bond that makes us understand one another on a profound level. From culinary en devours, to justice, to being CHD mothers we share so much. For her I am thankful.

I am thankful for Karin, because I can recall more than one occasion I have looked to her for CHD advice. We share the same pediatric cardiologist and knowing she's there when I have a question is always nice, for her I am thankful.

I am thankful for Alexia because she amazes me with her tenacity and strength. She's tough like her mother but a mentor in a way because she teaches me that living with CHD is just an obstacle and overcoming it in the mind is possible, for her I am thankful.

I am thankful for Samantha, for although we are oceans apart our sons have an identical defects which has bonded us from the beginning. I only hope one day we can meet in person and watch as our boys play together as brothers, for her I am thankful.

For ALL of my CHD family I love you and am thankful.

I am thankful for my friends:

I am thankful for Melissa who stays up late to have coffee at Denny's until all hours, who's always there for me and has ALWAYS been there for me from the beginning when I met her four years ago. She's been a rock for me during all that I've gone through with Marcelo and lots of other aspects of my life. From the time she came to the hospital and stayed through the first intense hours of ordeal after Marcelo was born and she held my hand as my newborn son was airlifted to Los Angeles to just being there if I needed her to watch Luciano, she is amazing. I am thankful for her unwavering friendship and even though our lives don't allow us daily conversations we can know that we are sisters. Her peaceful demeanor is calming and helps me to be rational when occasionally I cannot be, for her I am thankful.

I am thankful for Tiffeny. Not just for the thanks I owe her for taking Luciano to school and chatting with me in the mornings I really thank her for loving my children and genuinely caring for them. Knowing that Marcelo lights up when he sees his TT every morning and that Luciano can know her son as a "brother form another mother" makes my heart happy. For her dastardly sense of humor that rivals mine and makes for not only fun conversation but hours of fun, I know that she's a friend without judgement and I can count on her whenever, for her I am thankful.

I am thankful for my job, although it is a very new part of my life it helps to ground me, it helps to educate me, it helps to pay bills and above all else it helps me to help others who are looking to change their health and their lives. I am thankful.

For Facebook I am thankful, for knowledge I am thankful. For daydreaming, good food and wonder I am thankful. For vision, strength and justice I am thankful. For all of you who read this I am thankful. May this day of Thanksgiving be a renewal in all that is lacking in our lives. For life...I AM THANKFUL!

Big Day Big Week Big Month

My baby, my first born, my little precious boy is officially a 3rd grader. I dropped him of at school this morning and opposed to other mornings where he'd check to make sure I was still there, or would come back to greet me several times before I walked away, or would say, "mom stay and watch me play on the play ground" this time the air was different. He gave me a kiss and a hug and as all the children omitted play this morning for chatting and playing in line with giddiness abound, he walked away and forgot about Marcelo and I standing near the stroller went over and started playing with Conner and Brian and life was all good again.

Now Luciano is not really a big fan of school. He makes sure to tell me daily during the school year that he "hates school." But I think finally he might be starting to see the benefits and although I'm sure sitting at home eating snacks and playing computer or video games would be the ideal life of any kid, 10 whole weeks off this summer was finally getting to him. And frankly, it was getting to me too.

I know his teacher by name and face but I really have not much to go on about how her personality will mesh with his. While talking to another mom who's other child has had her a previous year she seems to be a good fit to keep Luciano on task and maybe keep up his approval for school this year. I've heard she's strict but non-judgemental and is good at keeping them on task. That is a GREAT fit for Luciano. He needs that extra push to stay plugging away. He's also a big chatter box (you didn't hear this here but he COULD have picked that trait up from his mother but she'd never admit it) and hopefully that won't be an issue. But hey, he's a GREAT student with a phenomenal mind and if talking is his only vice so be it. Life's too short to be quiet.

As I mentioned in the title, this is quite a surreal and big month we have ahead of us as a family. From me starting to work and school being back in session life seems to be a bit in altered mode right now. Things have coincided well and hopefully with me starting work again for the first time in years and Luciano starting school everything will eventually just fall into place. Tuesday was my first official training day at Mother's and I have to say I was pleasantly surprised that the 8 hours, for the most part, went by quickly and was somewhat entertaining. That is if work can be entertaining. I had quite a list of colorful customers and I'm sure they'll be included in future blogs. The environment with this company seems to be quite laid back and that suites me just fine. I'm not a good complacent worker and rigidity in management is not a good thing in my book. Now, granted this could all change when I finally meet the managers and staff at the new store but so far the people are great and mostly like minded in the health world as me and the comfort level was great.

I don't want to blow my own horn (well OK I do - hey when you've got it you've got it, right?) but I think the co-workers at the training store were pretty impressed that I wasn't just your run of the mill moron who they hired to fill a position. I tried to jump right in without stepping on toes and I learned the department and the location of product quickly. I had probably about 25 customers that day and all had different ailments looking for wellness. It's nice to be able to help people who are seeking out holistic wellness without having to beg them. They come to you, they believe what you say and they walk out happy. I'm really in awe at how much product flies off the shelves. They'll buy whatever you say and that's pretty amazing. Do you know how long I've tried to get people to listen to what I say about supplements and most likely I get an "OK I will," but they never do? Somehow a certificate and education don't mean much but when you have that little plastic badge on suddenly you're an expert. I keep that in mind as I attempt to still keep my wellness consulting business open and expand it while "working for the man."

I've been off the two past days which has been nice, 8 hours on your feet in shoes you thought were comfortable but turns out they weren't makes for quite a day. So, tomorrow I will be rested and I bought new more comfortable shoes and I'm ready to tackle work once again. Luciano will be in school most of the day and Marcelo will be with my mom. I guess the hardest part of this work thing is having to give up tradition. Everyone knows that Fridays is grocery shopping day for me and my mother and now I have to work Fridays all day so we're probably gonna have to switch to Wednesdays. The sad part is that when I was a little girl my mom and my grandma used to also shop on Fridays and my mom and I have continued this since I have had children and it's really our day to go have lunch and then shop at our usual stores. It's as much a pattern as it is fun but now after 30+ years the tradition must be changed, not in what we do so much but when we do it and well I'm gonna miss our Fridays together, I guess I'm gonna learn to love Wednesdays too.

Now the day is almost over and it's time to go see how Luciano did on his first day of 3rd grade. I hope all went well and he loved his teacher and school...now only 184days to go!!!

Monday I will officially be a "working girl" so...

I have decided this is my last weekend of freedom. Well, at least having the full weekend off. It appears that I'll only have to work one day on the weekend but I will not know for sure until Monday morning when I have my exciting new hire orientation @ Corporate. Which, by the way, is not more than a mere tiny office space above their warehouse in Costa Mesa but I figure the more I embellish it the more extravagant I will look in my new "position." See how I did that? Made it sound all important.

Ok so today (though as I write I notice it's after midnight, so yesterday), during the afternoon we headed out to Newport and Fashion Island for some delicious Gelato Paradiso and and some running around at the Big Koi Pond looking at the fish and snapping some pictures. It was a fun day, we started off in Tustin at the District. I love that place. Seems it has everything a person could need all in one spot. It was designed as a traffic mess but if you stay near the Costco side you can leave via the back side of Jamboree and get out of there in a hurray if need be. We went to Target to get some of the usual junk people and households need. Of course, like most every trip there one never just gets what is written on the list and I came home with the goods and some extra VERY cute T-Shirts for Marcelo. There was not much in the Big Boys department for Luciano. Of all people he starts school next week and he's in dire need of the "Big Day" outfit. Luckily for me he's still in the "I don't care" stage and I get to dress him cute and trendy like all young lads should be dressed. I did, however have to buy him some new shoelaces for his BRAND NEW shoes that Edgard decided to let him wear the other day to the zoo, of all places. Then quietly while I was still out, Mr. Manzi tried to HOSE DOWN the red dirt evidence on his new school shoes and let them dry in the patio. Let's just say I was not a happy camper having to wash red dirt and dust out of new shoes that were suppose to be for school. So @ Target today I purchased some new shoe laces so at the very least he will seem to have new shoes for school on Thursday. I made sure they were black in the hopes that I didn't make a TOTAL mistake buying white (with black trim) tennis shoes for school this year. Fingers crossed. I'm not sure why I care though, it's not like the GIANT sand pit that they call a playground doesn't grinf their shoes into oblivian in mere weeks.

Then it was off to Costco, we again needed the usual household goods like GIANT packages of paper towels because although I am a self professed eco-friendly mother I do have ONE vice and that would be paper towels. I go through them quite fast and although I attempt to control myself I seem to always be out of control when it comes to paper towel usage. We also bought a GIANT package of toilet paper and this is for an entirely other reason which is basically to make sure we don't run out, this mother knows better than to run out of TP with all boys in the house. AND of course the pièce de résistance: Costco has once again started carrying Veggie Straws and thus I tried to control myself but to no avail picked up two HUGE bags of them. I've been waiting for those to come back for weeks. My mom told me I should have waited because the coupon comes out on Monday but I am no dumby, had I waited those vultures that are Costco shoppers would have snatched them up before I could get my hands on them, so damn the $2 savings I was gonna buy my straws!!

Then it was off to Best Buy to look at some camera lenses. Had they had the one I wanted I was going to borrow it (with the receipt) for up to 30 days to make sure I liked it but they only had zooms and I was saved from comitting retail fraud. It got the wheels turning though. They had a sample Canon camera with a 28-135mm lens on it that would have made a fabulous addition to my camera but it only came with the body and well, I already have one of those. The lady said they had them online and the price was in the $600 range. So I pulled out my handy dandy iPhone, which by the way I have no idea how I possibly lived pre-iPhone, and did a quick bizrate search. I found it for around $400 bucks so if all pans out well with this new job I might have to sneak into owning this camera lens, credit card bills being the reason I'm getting a job notwithstanding.

So our last stop in the District in Tustin was to, of course, Whole Foods. This place is quite possibly my favorite place to shop. It is a holistic healthfood market on a grand scale where foodies of all levels are welcome. I wish our local Whole Foods had a Emeril cooking segment for Planet Green where I could watch the master in action but I'll stay content in just knowing such a wonderful store exists. I had to stock back up on Organic Baby Food and some unsweetened organic applesauce they have that is to die for in thier 365 brand. No sugar needed, and added to some walnuts and popped in the micro for like 30seconds becomes the topping to have on my homemade pancakes when I make them for the boys. I rarely use maple syrup for me anymore. Thank you Fat Belly Diet for helping me see the light. Don't get me wrong, organic real maple syrup is a wonderful addition to any pancake or waffle but this applesauce/walnut concoction just makes me smile. Plus, Whole Foods has some little French hermetically sealed squeezy applesauces I like to get for Marcelo. They're quick on the go and keep unopened in the diaper bag indefinitely without refridgeration. Gotta love the French. Trader Joe's has some good ones but the ones @ Whole Foods, although twice the price, have some unique flavors he likes. His palette seems to be forever changing and he gets bored with foods quickly. It's quite the feat keeping that child well fed.

After our day long jaunt through the District we headed south to Fashion Island for some koi watching and gelato enjoying fun in the late afternoon. I reallythink it's great that for August we've been having some mild weather. We can go out without sweating to death in the boiling sun and come home to a house that is not so hot it's impossible to cool down before midnight. So that's why all these people FLOCK to Southern California?

We arrived at Fashion Island without incident. We walked through the shops and saw all the crazy people walking their various sized dogs through the shopping center. Some huge poodles, to tiny little chiahuahuas. That place is definitely dog friendly, me...not so much. So as Marcelo reaches out the sides of his stroller to grab each dog we pass I have to become fighter pilot mama and manuveur between crowds of people with tiny kids everywhere and dogs abound. Now don't get me wrong animal lovers out there in blogland, I have no distain for dogs I have just come to the conclusion I am not a pet person. I admire those that can live with dogs snuggled up all hairy in bed with them or cat people who let he Mr. Jingles roam neighborhoods in search of rodent snacks and give kisses to him as he comes back in at night, I personally am just not that person.

We finally get downstairs in the food court, wash our hands and have a 8 year old potty break in time to grab two cups of Gelato and head back up the elevator to the koi pond for some R & R. Only one problem, as we near the elevator I see a large group of Asian people maybe 8 or 9 sitting near the restrooms chatting. They looked like a family out for a nice day @ the Island just like us, maybe a little shopping and good times. We push the button for the elevator and wait for it to open up and we start to get in. Mind you this elevator is maybe 4 feet deep by 6 feet long. We move to the back in case another person or TWO might care to ride up with us. Just then the ENTIRE family decides they'd like to ride the elevator too. Now, at first I didn't think they were all going to attempt to get on. An elderly man from the group and his wife came on first, I was with the stroller and tried to get as close to the wall as I could hoping Marcelo didn't try to reach from the stroller and grab anything from them. As the man shoved me back and squeezed in I noticed 2 more women from the group jumped in and a young man did the same. Then I see the motherly looking woman in the front catch the door as it was closing and they all started pushing back as if others were going to squeeze in. Now, if you read the last paragraph about my feelings on pets you'll probably eventually come to the conclusion that I am not only a bit of a control freak but I have anxious tendencies and I could not take it anymore. So out of my mouth (at a close to yelling tone) I ask, "wait wait wait, are more people trying to get onto this elevator? Because if they are I'm going to need to get off." Just then the 2 more young men trying to push their way in to the elevator from the family stop and look at me and the mother turns around with a snide look and asks, "do you want to get off?" To which I reply, "not really but if you think you're going to let 2 more people in this elevator you're ALL going to have to get out because I am not riding with you." Finally they said something, in I believe Japanese, and the two boys backed out and the doors closed. Now this was a single level elevator and well although it only took less than a minute to rise back up to our level it was a LONG ride up. The elderly couple who shoved themselves into me and the baby in the first place were now turned towards me speaking to each other in Japanese and giving me stink eye, to which I can only conclude it was something against me, which is fine. They can think what they want I was not about to ride in an elevator meant for maybe 5 people cramped in, with us 4 AND a stroller and a family of 8 or 9. Call me crazy but I just had to speak up. You see in my younger years I would have just grinned and beared the smashed people in the elevator and chalked it up to just one floor, no big deal, but as I age I find myself having more and more of a voice about how I choose to live. Not all people find that appropriate or prudent but I'm beginning to like this voice and hey it works. Although there were still quite a few people in that elevator, at the very least there were not 13.

We finally make it out the doors of the elevator and on our way back outside to the koi pond and they were still ratling off stink eyed accompanied comments as they headed the other way but I continued on my way and we had a wonderful time out enjoying the fresh ocean air of Newport Beach, some tasty gelato and good times with the boys. I've included some pictures of our afternoon at the pond I hope you enjoy!

One day down of my freedom ending weekend, one to go. Tomorrow we're heading to the new Bob's Big Boy for breakfast to relive our childhood memories and I'm making my famous slow roasted ribs for dinner it should be another lovely day at the Manzi house.

So here I go...

As if I don't have enough on my plate I started a blog. Who knows where this adventure will take me or how it will affect the multitude of visitors I plan on having flock to my words of wisdom and delight. Hey, there's nothing like aiming big right?

So I guess you'll need a bit of background about me and the fam. for those of you following from the beginning. I'm Rana, pronounced "raH-NAy" if you're wondering. I'm 33 years old and a wife to Edgard and Non-Toxic Mama to my two beautiful boys Luciano and Marcelo.

Luciano is 8 years old and in a few days going to go back to school as a BIG 3rd grader. Amazing how time flies. His name means "giver of light" and boy does he fit the bill. Luciano has never met a stranger and really does make people around him light up. He's an electronics aficionado, from his computer to every game console imaginable he's a video game-aholic and has been surfing the Internet for years. Now as for being electronically inclined most likely one could assume he got that trait from his father. I however have a secret, I am a female computer nerd myself, so I'm certain he got it from both angles. There really was no hope for him. His aspirations for life are HUGE, he plans on being a pilot. Of course this in an endeavour I plan to encourage at all costs. Imagine your child is a pilot and can arrange for free travel for you around the world. Go son, GO!!!

My youngest son is Marcelo and he's my precious little SPITFIRE!!! He's almost 20 months old and he definitely keeps me on my toes. His name means "little warrior" and at the time when we decided on the name we had NO IDEA the implications of it. You see Marcelo is a "heart baby." This means he was born with a Congenital Heart Defect (or CHD). His official diagnosis is d-Transposition of the Great Arteries, Ventricular Septal Defect and Pulmonic Stenosis; sounds scary I know. Maybe one day I'll go into all the technical stuff but LONG story short, he's considered "blue" because his heart mixes the blood that is suppose to go to the lungs to get more oxygen and sends it back out to the body un-oxygenated and it gives his skin a slight blue tinge and can make him winded easily as he runs around. He's had two open heart surgeries to help with this problem. One @ 5 days and the other @ about 10 months and he's doing really really well. We're hoping to get him to 6 or 7 years old without another surgery and who knows what great advances in medicine will occur to help fix his heart. As for just being a baby, that is certainly him. If you cannot see his scar you'd never know he was a heart baby, and I like it that way. I'm chalking a good portion of that up to him being breastfed. He's rarely been sick and knock wood for a heart baby he's NEVER seen the inside of an ER. He's a "warrior" alright, and he'll keep fighting and I'll be by his side to fight right along with him forever.

My husband and I have been married for 10 years. We live in Orange County, California and I love it that Orange County has officially become a place. We used to have to say the city we lived in which most people outside of the greater So. Cal. area generally did not know or that we lived by Disneyland or outside of Los Angeles, none of which were ever really acceptable to me because it didn't pinpoint your location good enough. We aren't part of L.A. (thank God) and I don't think Disneyland is the most distinguished landmark in the world. So thank you Bravo and The Housewives of Orange County not only did you put The O.C. on the map but you made people think we all spend our days basking by the pool and drinking margaritas while having our nails done and our hair did. And I'm OK with that.

I've been a stay-at-home mother for too many years to count. I "own" my own business, though I do use the term "business" quite lightly. I am a Certified Nutritional Consultant and a Holistic Health Practitioner and have my own nutritional consulting firm. I've been working at it (off and on) since 2003 and I can tell you it's a tough field to break into. People are HUGE skeptics and if insurance is not paying for it they won't shell it out. So I have a VAST wealth of knowledge in my head and I mostly give it away for free. This is not a bad thing, I went into this field to help myself and others but hey a girl's gotta get paid eventually, right? So my website is http://www.love2bewell.com/ and I'm going to keep plugging along and one day might hit my stride. Only time will tell I guess.

Recently, though, I have decided the bills are piling too high for comfort...don't get me wrong my husband makes a good living but we along with 75% of America enjoy living WELL beyond our means and in the present economic climate it might be a good idea to pay the bills off for good. So I went out and got a job. Here I am 33 years old, a college graduate, with extra certificates and two children going back to work in retail no doubt. It's @ a nearby healthfood store in the vitamin department and that suits me pretty well. My mother has graciously offered to take care of the kids and since childcare won't be an issue I'm diving in headfirst. Well, I'm hoping it becomes a platform for bigger and better things and I guess we'll just have to see how it works out.

OK, there you have it in a nutshell. I'm a non-toxic mama trying to live in a toxic world, I breastfeed my children and advocate others to do so as well, I'm not very keen on vaccines though I get their purpose. I'm addicted to knowledge and I think everyone should be, if it's not whatever in the world caused my son's heart defect, to swine flu that isn't, to air quality and climate change even where there's political craziness abound we live in a precarious time in history and now I've decided to blog about it. So welcome to my toxic world friends, I'm glad to have you here.